The Earl of Sandwich (open)
Jul 26, 2018 16:43:57 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Jul 26, 2018 16:43:57 GMT -5
Reuben wandered the Disney Springs market place in a makeshift disguise. It was necessary to conceal his alien appearance until he could find a way to get out of this predicament. It included a poncho, a wide brimmed hat, and black sandals, all of which he'd acquired for "free" from nearby stores. He read about the park off of a smartphone he'd "borrowed" from the pocket of a nearby tourist. He hadn't been caught, of course. Reuben was skilled enough to evade the security cameras and stealthily avoid any witnesses. Sure it was theft, but it wasn't his fault he'd been plopped so suddenly into the warm waters of Lake Buena Vista holding nothing but a now soggy egg salad sandwich he'd had to throw away. And considering that he was designed to do much, much, worse, Reuben was actually doing these tourists and the park a favor by not living up to his untapped potential for extreme property damage.
Anyways, if he had to get out of this situation, he was going to need some brain food. And not just any brain food. It had to be a sandwich. Probably a reuben. Thankfully, It was only a short walk to his destination: The Earl of Sandwich. It literally sounded like his kind of restaurant. Licking his chops eagerly, he eagerly made his way inside. At first he though he was going to have run off with an unpaid sandwich and eat it in some hidden location, an action he was reluctant to take. Partially due to the sheer immorality of stealing from this fine establishment, but mostly, to be honest, because he didn't want to run anywhere. Then, he saw something that he knew could reverse his fortune. He wouldn't only be able to pay for the sandwich, but improve his general situation as well. He just had to play his cards right...
In the Manager's office:
"Oh, this is bad..." Said the manager of The Earl of Sandwich Restaurant.
"Yes...it's just disgusting how little he thinks of the customers and this establishment as a whole." Said Reuben.
"Please tell me you haven't uploaded this yet." The manager added.
"Oh no, not yet, I though it best to consult you first. Who knows? I might not have been the only one who filmed him in the act." said Reuben, in an inexplicably Brooklyn accent.
"And he did it twice today?!" The manager's voice rose a little.
"Well...obviously..." Reuben replied. "Right now, the best course of action would be to fire him, replace him with someone who has more experience, passion, and above all, good hygiene. If you have a spare 15 minutes for an impromptu job interview, you can have a new, model employee who can start today...Like me for instance."
The manager knew that interviews typically went on for much longer, but he wanted to resolve this situation as quickly as possible, and if this little man was willing to take up only 15 minutes of his time to try to convince him why he should work here, then so be it.
Upon receiving permission, Reuben grinned again. "You, sir, have made the right choice. I swear, you won't regret it."
16 minutes later
Reuben left the manager's office, dressed in the garb of a new employee. His natural passion for, and knowledge of sandwich making had quickly convinced the man to hire him on the spot. He even got the manager to pay him up front. After all, he needed the money. And while Reuben looked nothing like a human being, he'd managed to convince the manager how much the kids would love being served by someone who somewhat resembled Stitch, though far more handsome...in his opinion. While the manager fired the nose picker, Reuben returned to the stores to pay for the clothes and deposit the phone in lost and found, taking care to email himself the video before deleting it and any trace that he'd used the phone beforehand. He wanted to have as little drama as possible while he worked here. And he planned to be here for a long time. Of course, people would notice his alien appearance, but since he was also wearing employee clothing, they'd naturally assume that his job description included dressing up as a character. Yes, things were looking up for Reuben.
"Hey there! What'll you have?" He said, as he greeted the first customer of his shift.
Anyways, if he had to get out of this situation, he was going to need some brain food. And not just any brain food. It had to be a sandwich. Probably a reuben. Thankfully, It was only a short walk to his destination: The Earl of Sandwich. It literally sounded like his kind of restaurant. Licking his chops eagerly, he eagerly made his way inside. At first he though he was going to have run off with an unpaid sandwich and eat it in some hidden location, an action he was reluctant to take. Partially due to the sheer immorality of stealing from this fine establishment, but mostly, to be honest, because he didn't want to run anywhere. Then, he saw something that he knew could reverse his fortune. He wouldn't only be able to pay for the sandwich, but improve his general situation as well. He just had to play his cards right...
In the Manager's office:
"Oh, this is bad..." Said the manager of The Earl of Sandwich Restaurant.
"Yes...it's just disgusting how little he thinks of the customers and this establishment as a whole." Said Reuben.
"Please tell me you haven't uploaded this yet." The manager added.
"Oh no, not yet, I though it best to consult you first. Who knows? I might not have been the only one who filmed him in the act." said Reuben, in an inexplicably Brooklyn accent.
"And he did it twice today?!" The manager's voice rose a little.
"Well...obviously..." Reuben replied. "Right now, the best course of action would be to fire him, replace him with someone who has more experience, passion, and above all, good hygiene. If you have a spare 15 minutes for an impromptu job interview, you can have a new, model employee who can start today...Like me for instance."
The manager knew that interviews typically went on for much longer, but he wanted to resolve this situation as quickly as possible, and if this little man was willing to take up only 15 minutes of his time to try to convince him why he should work here, then so be it.
Upon receiving permission, Reuben grinned again. "You, sir, have made the right choice. I swear, you won't regret it."
16 minutes later
Reuben left the manager's office, dressed in the garb of a new employee. His natural passion for, and knowledge of sandwich making had quickly convinced the man to hire him on the spot. He even got the manager to pay him up front. After all, he needed the money. And while Reuben looked nothing like a human being, he'd managed to convince the manager how much the kids would love being served by someone who somewhat resembled Stitch, though far more handsome...in his opinion. While the manager fired the nose picker, Reuben returned to the stores to pay for the clothes and deposit the phone in lost and found, taking care to email himself the video before deleting it and any trace that he'd used the phone beforehand. He wanted to have as little drama as possible while he worked here. And he planned to be here for a long time. Of course, people would notice his alien appearance, but since he was also wearing employee clothing, they'd naturally assume that his job description included dressing up as a character. Yes, things were looking up for Reuben.
"Hey there! What'll you have?" He said, as he greeted the first customer of his shift.